Time and Motion – a 100-word story

This week’s photo prompt for Friday Fictioneers comes courtesy of © Douglas M MacIlroy

17102014

Friday Fictioneers prompt for October 17, 2014 ©Douglas M MacIlroy

Time and Motion

Ecterine watched Roberto come up the path. He greeted her kindly and lifted her latest tile denoting the sun setting among the islands.
She was glad of his help but it pained Ecterine that she could no longer climb to the sacred wall to place it herself, as the women of her tribe had always done.
“Will you ask again in the village, Roberto?” said Ecterine anxiously. “I must have an apprentice.”
“The young do not understand,” he sighed.
It amused Roberto that his batty old neighbour thought she alone made the sun rise and set. Still, the tourists loved her quirky artwork, so it paid to play along.

©Siobhán McNamara

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34 Responses to Time and Motion – a 100-word story

  1. Ah the old customs gone lost to tourists

  2. Sandra says:

    What a charming tale! And poignant too. Well done.

  3. draliman says:

    I hope she finds an apprentice if only to set her mind at rest. Lovely story!

  4. Dear Siobhán,

    A tender and poignant tale. A bit of a female version of Don Quixote and her Sancho Panza. I sensed much more story between the lines. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  5. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear Siobhan,

    I love the name Ecterine. Fantastic story from an amazing imagination.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    • Thank you Doug, and thanks for the photo prompt. As a coast-dweller who never leaves the shore empty-handed I really loved it.
      Re the name Ecterine, I was looking (i.e. googling) for a name that meant ‘innocent,’ as that is how I saw the female character. Of the many that I came across I chose this one because it sounded a bit unusual, and also meant ‘aspires to responsibility’ so I thought it was perfect for her. Glad you liked it 🙂

  6. A truly moving story, Siobhán. Growing old and watching important traditions fade away is tough.

    • Thanks Lisa, so many things are lost for want of someone to pass them on to. It was only when my mother died that I realised just how much I had learned from her, and from the generations that went before her

  7. I liked the “twist” ending – Unexpected but in a very poignant way.

  8. I don’t like Roberto!!!! But I love Ecterine. May she prove him wrong.

  9. storydivamg says:

    Something tells me it would be the end of Ecterine if Roberto ever stopped playing along. And I’m sure that for someone, at some time, the sun really did rise and set all because of her.

    Beautiful tale this week, Siobhan.

    All my best,
    Marie Gail

  10. I think she does control the sun. Feed her vitamins! Get her an apprentice!

  11. Margaret says:

    There’s so much in your story. Very touching.
    Marg

  12. I’m with Patrick on this one. How wonderful if she did control the sun? How sad that no one knew. Lovely story. Fabulous imagination. Thanks for sharing.

  13. What a beautiful, tender story! I loved that old woman. Glad that Roberto humored her, and didn’t openly mock her.
    And your imagination is brilliant — I didn’t see the rising sun in that picture, until you mentioned it in your story! Lovely!

  14. Siobhan, Good story. Apparently her mind may be fading but not her talent. Well written. 🙂 — Susan

  15. I really loved the pay-off here, though I wouldn’t be surprised if the joke turned out to be on Roberto.

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